Summer School

Here's the summer:

Why buy a sandbox when you can dig a hole in the new grass?  And what's regression?

F needed rescuing yesterday when a caterpillar was on her paddle board.  M said, "Don't touch the caterpillar, it's poisonous!"  What he meant was the hairs can get in your skin and make you itch.  F thought the caterpillar was going to grow giant fangs and bite her I guess because she started screaming.  She screams a lot on a normal day, so we tend to ignore her screaming.  But this got a little crazy.  She kept scooting backward off her board until her back end was under water (she was wearing a life jacket, so there wasn't any danger of her drowning) while screaming and screaming and screaming.  Finally, when it was apparent that she was nearing hysterics, we sent IJ over to rescue her off her board and bring her to shore.  I turned to M and said, "How did we create a child who is scared of a caterpillar?"

Here's the school:

Today is the last day of weekly contact with the school district.  Our coordinator always sends little trivia "facts" for the kids.  I never share them, but one she sent today was just too weird to not share.  This is what she wrote: Watermelon is actually a VEGETABLE! It is from the botanical family Cucurbitaceae and is most closely related to cucumbers, pumpkins and squash.  I started an email writing her back saying, "Actually, watermelon, cucumbers, pumpkins, and squash are all fruit because they are the seed-bearing ovary of the plant."  Instead, I decided to make this our social studies/science lesson for the day.  I asked the kids which it was and why.  IJ's answers were vegetable because it sounds like a trick questions and fruit because it could be a trick to the trick question.  It reminded me of that scene in The Princess Bride when Vizzini enters in the battle of wits with the man in black.  S decided watermelons were vegetables because they grow on vines in a garden and fruit grow on trees or bushes.  E decided watermelons were fruit because they taste yummier than vegetables.

We then made a list of who gets to decide if something is a fruit or vegetable.  They came up with scientists, gardeners, King of the World, old people-because they are wise, farmers, government, and chefs.  I thought it was a pretty good list!  Especially since I did a tiny bit of research beforehand to see what this watermelons-are-vegetables nonsense was built on.  So, who is right? Depends on who you ask.  If you ask a chef, watermelons are fruit because they are not served in, with, or after the soup, fish, meat, or main dish.  So E was right.  But then again, if you ask a fruit or vegetable importer/handler of the USDA, the watermelon is part of the cucurbit family, which also includes the cucumber.  They grow on the ground and need to be handled differently than something that does not grow on the ground.  And if the watermelon is related to a cucumber, which is obviously a vegetable, then the watermelon is also a vegetable.  So S is right.  But if you ask a scientist (or the USDA again), what the scientific definition of a fruit is, the watermelon, cucumber, pumpkin, and squash are all fruits.  So that means I am right. 

And last, and funniest (or most pathetic?) of all, if you ask the Oklahoma House of Representatives and State Senate in 2007, you find out the watermelon is a vegetable because they voted the watermelon is the Official State Vegetable of Oklahoma.  The bills were introduced by a Democrat in the House and a Republican in the Senate.  Both are from an area that would profit from watermelon sales if the bill passed.  So now we know.  The politicians have decided for us based on how much money their district receives from watermelon sales.  Watermelons are vegetables and science be damned!

My Surprise Baby Shower

Yes, it is true.  I'm going to have my 6th baby and I have never had a baby shower...until yesterday.  I was completely blown away with the out pouring of love and support from my local friends when they surprised me!  I did know that something was up...I know my husband very well and some things he did in the last month have been out of character for him.

It all started when the first chicks hatched last month and we were unprepared for them.  M decided out of the blue that he wasn't going to be caught unprepared when this baby came, so I needed to make a list of things that I might need for when this baby is born.  He asked when I might need these items and I was like...."When the baby is born?"  No, no, when will it be a good time to go shopping for them because he really wanted to take me shopping.  Him, take me shopping for baby things? I told him the end of June would be fine while I thought to myself, "Is this my husband? This is our 6th baby together.  He's never ever done anything like this before. Who are you and what have you done with my real husband?"  He also got on craigslist to find the perfect replacement for our little baby car seat because mine has been stuck in its base since E was a baby...and it expired about the same time (but we fixed it instead of buying a new one).

Two weeks ago, I wrote "NW Trek Slug Festival" on the calendar for June 23rd.  M looked at it and said, "That is a terrible day to go to NW Trek. I can't go."  I said, "Fine, I'll go by myself. You don't have to go."  He took last Friday off so he could go with us...and I had a date.  For what, I still wasn't sure, but I had my suspicions.

Thursday, M said, "What would you like to do Saturday? Go to the zoo? The beach?"  Again, I know my husband.  We don't do things like that on weekends, especially a weekend after he worked nights all week.  We go on weekdays to avoid crowds.  Plus, he had already said that Saturday was a terrible day to go to NW Trek.  But all of a sudden it was a great day to go to the zoo? Or beach? Hmmm... I made sure I was showered and had clean laundry Friday night.

Saturday morning, M said we would be going to the beach at 1:30 for low tide.  Now I had a time. But then it started to rain.  I could have made it difficult for him.  I could have stayed in my PJs and insisted on cleaning house.  But I didn't.  We decided a trip to Costco at 1:30 would be perfect.  We would let D take his nap in the van on the way in, pick up enough food to survive for a month, and everything would be all good.  But D needed his nap at 12:45.  I just couldn't keep him awake.  Normally, we would wait until he woke up because Costco trips don't have to be timed...but M was agitated by the turn of events.  "Do we have to leave at 1:30 on the dot?" I asked.  "I like to do things by the clock," he said.  Baloney!  "By the way, the Cub Master called.  I left one of my Scout boxes in the lobby of the church and I need to swing by and pick it up on the way in to town."  Now I had a place.  M's story would have been good...but I was at the church the night before talking about Scouts with the youth pastor and there was no box in the lobby.  In fact, I know where all three of his boxes are in the house.  But I didn't say anything.

At 1:25, knowing that he was going to just drive me to the church and drop me off, I suggested that we leave IJ in charge of sleeping D while we were shopping.  I started baby-sitting at age 10; IJ would be fine and D needs the sleep. M suggested we leave S too, which I heartily agreed to (If we were really going to Costco, there is no way I would leave them). 

M drives faster than I do, so a trip that takes me 30 minutes only takes him 25...and M had 5 minutes to kill when we reached the last gas station before the church.  Normally we don't stop for candy bars on our way to Costco, but M needed one.  I had him fill up the gas tank while we were there so I wouldn't have to do it later in the week.  "Great idea!" he said.  Before he got out of the van, he asked me what kind of candy I wanted.  "Suuuuurrrrrprise me!" I said.  I could see he hid a smile.  When we pulled in to the church parking lot, I recognized my friend's vehicles.  I offered to run in and check the lobby for the box, you know, to make it easy for him.  What kind of man would send his 9-months-pregnant wife in to carry a box for him?

Now it was my turn to get back at him... I stood in the lobby for a second, heard my friends around the other side, and walked back out.  I went to the van and told M there was no box in the lobby.  He tried to look like he was confused, but he really needed to figure out a way to send me the right direction.  I said (just for him), "Maybe he meant it was in the classroom you used.  Should I go look there?"  Relief washed over his face as he nodded.

I went in and my friends surprised me!  They had arranged a spa day, just for me!  But I will get to that part in a second, I wasn't done getting my revenge on M.  I told my friends I would be right back after I sent M home.  I went out to the parking lot, got in my seat, acted like I was putting my seat belt on, and said, "There was no scout box there either."  I wish I could describe his face at that moment.  I didn't make him suffer long.  I said with a big grin, "It looks like someone is playing a trick on you!"  He said, "They certainly are!" because he knew then that I knew.

I am not used to being the center of attention and being pampered.  My friend soaked my feet and scrubbed them with a lavender scrub.  She hired a henna artist for henna tattoos-I got my belly done!  She gave me a hair cut!  Another friend gave me a back rub and still another french-braided my now short hair.  We played some games, including the candy bar/diaper game which I am totally awesome at!  I was terrible at the sock matching game.  You can see my priorities lie with chocolate, not laundry.  My friends shared inspirational thoughts and scripture with me for the upcoming birth.  I have never, ever, felt so loved and supported by a group of women.

I promise, I will post pictures when I get some!

Raccoon Repelling and Slug Slinging

Ever since the lady at the end of our driveway moved away and stopped feeding the raccoons, we've had several  hits on the coop.  We've lost three chickens and a bunch of eggs (the raccoon pulled the chicken off the nest and ate the eggs, right there in the coop while the chickens freaked out).  This on the heels of selling 22 two year old hens has caused our egg production to fall to about 9 eggs per day.  Which is a nice change from the two dozen we were getting, but we still don't like losing our chickens.  The other night S and I scared the raccoon off, in fact it growled at me from the bushes when I recovered the body of the freshly killed rooster!  We've determined the time the raccoon usually strikes: right before dusk.  By the time it is dark and we are ready to close up the coop for the night, the damage is done.

My new method for keep the raccoon at bay is to send my loud children outside to play at 8:30 PM.  This is usually our bedtime, especially in winter.  But at this time of year we've barely finished our dinner (I have a strong circadian rhythm and have trouble living by a clock this time of year-I was wide awake at 5:30 AM this morning).  The kids and I are ready to go for another few hours-until 11:00 PM at least!  This is also the best time of day for garden maintenance... 

"Toss that slug, F!"

Once upon a time, I read a book called Slug Tossing.  I forgot it existed until I heard E exclaim how many slugs were in the garden (and they were eating my precious kale).  My slug enthusiasts now go into the garden and toss the slugs into the blackberry bushes while I water.  I'm very happy to keep my veggies poison free while keeping the raccoon at bay long enough for the chickens to get in the coop.  The kids are even learning how to weed and thin!  So even though I told M I was going to have nothing to do with the gardens...

...at least I don't have to bend down to weed or pick anything and the kids are a getting great garden education.

Daisy Pictures

Kids and Work

Many of my favorite blogs and magazines have recently featured articles about children and chores.  The take home message is teach your children how to work.  Include them in the work and you will raise adults that have the ability to work.  Work with them, work cheerfully, and you will raise adults that have a positive attitude about work.  As someone who has struggled my whole life with motivating myself to work (especially housework) and doing the mundane everyday with a positive attitude, these writings really appeal to me.  I do not want to set my children up for failure!

The amazing thing is that children like to work!  They love to be big enough to be included and help the family!  And little kids are fully capable of doing good work.  They just need to be taught.  This last week I wrote up a detailed list on how to clean the bathroom.  I included a list of cleaning supplies (non toxic) and step-by-step instructions.  I called the kids to the laundry room to start our "field trip" and showed them exactly what everything looked like and where it was stored.  We traveled to the bathroom together and instead of demonstrating everything, I had the boys read the instructions and demonstrate to me which each step was.  And you know what? IJ and S can clean a bathroom with no problems!

Even F and D can work.  F can unload the dryer on rainy days and carry laundry baskets.  She can fold wash clothes and sort her's and E's laundry.  She can help her brothers water the chickens by turning the hose on and off.  In the picture above, you can see E taking the dry laundry off the line.  She hands it to D, who puts it in the basket (E also informed me that D carried this basket in the house too!).  D is also very good at picking things up off the floor and handing them to me and also running garbage to the garbage can when we do a room pickup.    

As this pregnancy progresses and I slow down, I am comforted in knowing that I have great kids that can make sandwiches, cook eggs, switch laundry, sweep and vacuum, and scrub toilets.  They care for the animals and each other...and me!  In the past, after a baby was born, it was usually a struggle getting everything taken care of, especially when M went back to work.  I remember standing in the kitchen with a newborn E and toddler IJ and S, wondering how I was going to get lunch for them.  Now I have three capable children to choose from for sandwich making and the postpartum days don't seem so scary.  M can just go back to work the day after if he wants....JUST KIDDING!

Day of the Dummies

I went to three stores today: Home Depot, Costco, and Albertson's.  All I saw were dummies.  Dummy is too tame a word for the people I saw, but I try to keep this blog family friendly.

At Home Depot, I bought 14 rolls of sod.  I asked for help loading the sod in my van because I am obviously nine months pregnant and I am in no way interested in bending over to pick up dirty things and having them squish my belly.  There were two perfectly able women working in the nursery, but neither one would load the sod.  They had to call a guy from plumbing to come load the sod.  And it wasn't like the sod was even heavy!  Meanwhile, I had to stand in the rain with the back of my van open in the middle of the road.  One of the women walked by me and said, "Oh, no one is here yet? I'm sure he'll be here soon." and kept walking.  Seriously??? If I weren't nine months pregnant, I would have loaded the sod myself!

Next stop was Costco.  There were three carts in front of the store.  Three perfectly-able men who could see that I am obviously nine months pregnant took all three carts even though they looked straight at me!  But it was more like looking straight through me.  I had to walk all the way around to the side of the store to get myself a cart...where another man didn't offer me the cart he just dislodged and neither did the skinny woman in her workout clothes.  What is with these rude people?!?  Inside the store, there was a cute old couple, each in their own little motor scooter carts.  But then they parked side-by-side, blocking the entire aisle, got out of their scooters, and started filling their baskets with snack foods.  Seriously??? Couldn't they parallel park so the lady who is obviously nine months pregnant wouldn't have to turn her cart around and go a different way???

And then there was Albertson's.  Another couple with their toddler-aged child was in the produce section.  With their bike and attached jogging stroller. Seriously??? IN THE STORE?  I wanted to say, "Excuse me, the rest of us left our vehicles in the parking lot so we wouldn't block the aisles.  Haven't you heard of a shopping cart?"  I stared at them in grouchy disbelief until another woman caught my eye.  She rolled her eyes, I shrugged, and we both turned our carts around and went a different way.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I love bike commuting and relied on my bike as my only form of transportation before I was married and had kids.  But I never ever took my bike into a store.  That is just bad manners!  If you are stupid enough to leave your bike lock at home, you are stupid enough to get your bike (and jogging stroller) stolen.  And then there were the teenagers buying energy drinks and liquor.  Only one looked old enough to buy the liquor.  Their cart blocked the entire aisle too!  So what does a lady who is obviously nine months pregnant do?  Pushes their cart out of the way with hers, bumper car style.

Why are there so many inconsiderate idiots out today? Is it because I'm just not used to shopping on Saturday night?  Are they always there, but I usually have my kids and am focused on them?

Northwest Trek

Today we took a trip to Northwest Trek, courtesy of the school district!  This was a science field trip that is part of our Washington State unit.  My children were supposed to experience native wildlife...Keep in mind that this is our backyard (with a dog)...

...And this is NW Trek (with a bison)...

 there really wasn't too much for them to learn, especially at first.

The first section of the park was disappointing.  We were supposed to be seeing cats: bobcat, cougar, and lynx.  Every single cat was hiding in its enclosure.  I don't really blame them.  There were lots of kids from schools running around and screaming.  I would have hidden too. We asked ourselves, "Why did we drive all this way to look at plants? We could do that in our backyard!"  But the weather was great and so was the exercise (for me), so we persevered.

The first creature we saw was this piece of wood that confused S.  It looked like some kind of monster peering out from between the trees.  After that we were no longer disappointed.  We saw...

 ...wolves...

...bears (and a bunch of other things).  Then we took the tram ride and got to see the herbivores.

 Bison (with babies)

Elk

Moose (you can't see it in the picture.  There are only three moose in the whole park and seeing them is very rare.  We spotted her though!)  The tram driver told of a cougar that sneaked into the park and feasted on bison burgers, lamb chops, and chocolate moose until it was captured, tagged, and moved elsewhere.  Within a week (or so) of moving the cougar, it was killed by a car.  S did not like that the poor cougar was kicked out of the park and hit by a car, just because he was hungry!  (He is, after all, part of the food chain and natural).

M wasn't sure we could make it through the entire 55 minute tram ride with D, but we did.  He enjoyed making faces at the other kids and pointing to the animals.  I sat with the girls with the boys in the seat next to us.  The hardest thing was reminding them not to accidentally pull the emergency cord.

After our tram ride was over, we went to the children's hands-on house.  E got to see a slug!  WOW!  A real live SLUG! Like we've never seen one of those before...  While we were there, M asked a park employee if they fed the extra herbivores to the carnivores.  The carnivores actually get special food processed just for zoo creatures.  They no longer have to hunt.  Hmmm... I'm thinking this "park" of native "wildlife" in its "natural habitat" isn't as wild or natural as we think...

...speaking of wild and natural and hunting...I was not too interested in the eagles (those chicken-killers).  We see those all the time.  But I liked the pictures we took.  My coyote and raccoon pictures were blurry, which is okay.  We see those all the time here too (those chicken-killers).

Before we headed home, a nice lady offered to take our picture.  So here we are, including my big baby belly.

Working, Friends, and Crossover

I am now finished with my 30-day reviews for the school district.  I remember back in September when I had to write my first of the year..."One down, nine to go," I said to myself.  Writing 30-day reviews is a lot of work!  I have to remember exactly what topics, activities, and assessments we had for each class for each kid.  That would be 15 total reviews each month.  Luckily for this month, we've worked together doing a unit study on Washington State and I was able to copy the same review for each kid.  And then I was done until next September!  I celebrated my success by meeting my friends at the park after my work was done.  I let the kids come too.

After our four hours at the park, we had our Crossover Ceremony for Cub Scouts.  IJ moved from Webelos 1 to Webelos 2 and S moved from Bears to Webelos 1.  We don't have an actual bridge for the boys to cross.  And the leaders encourage the boys to cross in any manner that appeals to them.  I should have known S had something planned when he wanted to be last.  He slithered across on his belly like a snake.  Lovely.  I didn't get a picture because another mom stepped right in front of me when I tried to take my picture. 

 My Webelos.  My clowns.

Horseshoe Lake

I spent my weekend "off" creating a new, beautiful schedule for our summer days (because as kids grow and change, the schedule has to too).  The first two hours went great!  Then I got an email from a friend asking if she could compete with the YMCA for my attention this afternoon...

...She was going to head to Horseshoe Lake for the afternoon because today is supposed to be the nicest day of the week.  I immediately decided that what good is a schedule and homeschooling if you have to miss all the good weather and miss out on an opportunity to spend the day at the park BEFORE the public schooled kids are out for summer?

One of the ways I keep my kids organized is by color coding.  Every child has their assigned color; it may or may not be their favorite.  D learned his colors by naming whose things belong to whom.  The great thing is Gaterade and Powerade both come in their colors too!  I bought the three older kids swim rings today (in their colors) and F and D sand toys (in their colors).  We spent 3 1/2 hours swimming, playing, and cooking in the sun with our greatest pals.  I can't think of a better way to spend a day.

These three kids thought they could catch the fish they are chasing with their bare hands! Hilarious!

Slugs and Bugs

Slugs and bugs are the big thing at my house...still.  This morning, while I was taking a lovely nature walk around the house, D pointed to something on the ground and called it a yucky bug.  F bent down to examine it.

F: Yep, it was a bug.  I absolutely stepped on it.
Me: You mean you accidentally stepped on it?
F: No.  I absolutely stepped on it.

Others we've heard this last week are:
S:...and in one day, you will be eaten by a SHARK!
F: No it won't.  It will be TWO DAYS!

Me: ...and S, don't let F get your goat, okay?
S: What's "get my goat?"
F: I already have it! Ha ha!

(warning: bathroom humor)
F: ...my poo is so smelly, it smells almost as bad as mama's bathroom!
And that would be because we are back on disposable diapers until the baby is born.  Disposables are much nastier than washing cloth.  But I have no energy to do laundry.

And on a final note, my blog no longer qualifies as a member of Timberdoodle's review team.  Sniff, sniff.  I have to have at least 500 readers to qualify.  And I'm not interested in expanding my readership, I'm only interested in scaling down before the baby comes (which is why we sold 22 laying hens this last week).  Timberdoodle offered me a free extreme dot-to-dot book (500-1400 dots per puzzle) as a consolation prize...free with my next order, that is.  Ummm....no thanks.  By the time any of my kids can count that high, they no longer want to draw other people's pictures.

I'm off to make some tomato soup out of V8!

Boot Awareness

Once upon a time we used to check out boots for spiders.  Before we lived here, any boots or shoes that got left behind ended up with one of those scary tunnel spiders living in them.  Now we have to check for...

Do you need a closer look at that?

That would be a nasty surprise for my little ones!

Black Powder Rifles and Tomahawks

Oh, we had fun today.  We visited a local black powder gun range for a day of rifle shooting, tomahawk throwing, archery, and fire starting with flint and steel put on by a black powder rifle club.

We were invited (along with the rest of our Cub Scout pack) by a family that is involved with this anachronistic group.  This was right up IJ's alley.  He and one other boy from the pack proudly sported coonskin caps and vests instead of their Webelos caps.

M, S, and their group learning fire starting techniques. (On a side note-for my friends who also scout-we had "Class B" T-shirts printed for the boys to wear to activities like this so they wouldn't wear their uniforms, but still look like a group.  A screen printing place donated a part of the cost, so the shirts were only $7 each!)

D met many new four-legged friends.  And he also met an elderly man sitting by the fire with a walking stick who he called Grandad and tried to share his chips with.  Yes, I teared up.  D was only 16 months old when Grandad passed away, but he still looks for him wherever we go.

 S uses a "primitive" bow and arrow set.

You can see the tomahawk just under the Scotch broom in the picture above.

Little sisters got to participate too!  E didn't sink any tomahawks, but I hear she was a good archer and a good shot with the rifle!

My kids were in three different groups and we decided the gun range wasn't the safest place for me to be with F and D, so I stayed by the fire ring with the other women. 

M had a blast shooting the rifles and throwing the tomahawks as well!  We were one of the last families to leave.  I can see us participating in a group like this in the future!

Let the Race Begin!

We're quickly coming to the end of my scheduled school year.  Our last unit for social studies is Washington State.  I have an information-packed generic book about Washington from the library and I read a chapter every day.  Today we read about living in Washington State. 

There is a beautiful moment in homeschooling when one discovers the best way their children learn, the best way one teaches, and finds that sweet spot between learning and play...

...my method is to let them watch so much TV their brains go numb, read to them, and then lock them outside.  Just kiddin'.  I teach them all most of the day and when I turn them loose, all the knowledge comes back out in the form of play.  I've actually found that taking them to afternoon activities (sports, etc) inhibits their learning because they don't process the information in the same way as they do when they are home.

As we were finishing up the chapter on living in Washington this morning, we talked about some fun events that happen in our state.  Like Bumbershoot in Seattle.  And the Puyallup Fair in Puyallup (where else?).  And The Slug Festival held in Eatonville.  When my kids heard about the slug races, they decided to capture and train their own slugs for races.

M and I bought this book when we were first dating.  Aren't we fun?  I can see where our kids get their zany ways.  As IJ went running out the door with my book, I asked that they use the book to find what kind of slugs they had and the appropriate habitat elements for them.

I don't think this guy is ready for the big race, do you?  Lucky for us, the festival is only three weeks away.  Plus, the school district provided us with a family membership to Northwest Trek! What a perfect field trip!